Marriage and Self-Reflection
In the 2050s B.S., we entered into the bond of marriage. Our marriage was founded on inter-caste love. Both of us were teenagers then but were conscious of social status, family structure, and dignity. Even at that time, we felt that nothing could hinder love, and we still firmly believe that our decision was right. We remain steadfast and satisfied with our relationship. Looking back, we might have been immature in age, but we possessed the necessary understanding regarding responsibility, affection, and morality.
A few years after marriage, our daughter was born, followed by our son after six years. Under the joint guardianship of grandparents, great-grandparents, and uncles, our children were raised. After our daughter passed the SLC examination, she began her 11th-grade studies at a school hostel in Kathmandu. Time passed, and both children completed their education. Our daughter graduated with a bachelor’s degree. We are proud that our children have grown up to be humble, ethical, and practical, steering clear of any wrongdoing. We consider ourselves fortunate for this.
During our daughter’s postgraduate studies, one day she approached me and said, “Mom, I need to talk to you about something.” Initially, I was a bit worried, and many questions arose in my mind. After a brief pause, she revealed that she was in a romantic relationship. Then a stream of questions flooded my mind—Who is the boy? What kind of person is he? What is his family like? We began considering how to manage the situation in the days ahead. It took some time to convince my husband, but eventually, he trusted her. Our daughter introduced the boy she liked during her graduation ceremony. At that moment, her father was surprised by this unexpected meeting. He is typically a quiet, studious man who maintains close relationships only with select people.
It did not take long for him to accept our daughter’s relationship. Although she was of marriageable age, she still seemed young to us. We considered ourselves mature but did not see her as ready for marriage. At the time, we only viewed the truth as a dream. During the last Dashain festival, the boy’s family came to formally request our daughter’s hand in marriage, and negotiations began. On the 28th of Falgun, the daughter’s wedding was successfully held. She left happily, and we felt that we had fulfilled our duty successfully.
Many lessons in life are learned more through experience than from books. The meaning of true friends and relatives is also understood this way. Some relatives are not truly relatives, while some can be more affectionate, helpful, and respectful than others. These reflections compel us to appreciate genuine and intimate relationships fully and to savor the sweetness of life—nothing can stop you from doing that.
(The author, Pooja Khadka, is a teacher at Gorkha Model Secondary School, Lamahi-6, Dang.)